“Almost every parent will experience some anxiety sending a child to college,“In addition to the timeless worries — ‘ Will my child succeed academically? Will my child fit in?’ — There are heightened concerns today about campus safety and rising tuition.”
‘Do’s and Don’ts’ for Today’s Parents
Do recognize this is a time of ambivalence for all parents. The excitement and joy about opportunities awaiting your child are mixed with waves of nostalgia and a sense of loss. Talk with other parents who are going through the same thing.
Don’t tell your child, “These are the best years of your
life.”
No one is happy all the time. When a student is homesick, or
overtired from studying all night, or a romantic relationship has just fallen
apart, it’s not reassuring to have parents imply that this is as good as it
gets.
Do discuss academic goals and expectations ahead of time.
Remember, many first-year students do not do as well
academically in their first semester of college as they did in high school, and
many change their minds about their proposed course of study.
Don’t try to solve your child’s problems.
Encourage your child to use the appropriate campus
resources, whether that means an adviser, professor, health services caregiver
or career center professional.
Do send care packages.
Cookies, treats, even everyday necessities such as shampoo
and toothpaste are reminders that say, “I’m thinking of you.”
Don’t expect a response to every text.
A cell phone can be a wonderful way to keep in touch, but
don’t make it, as one student described, an “electronic leash.”
Do take comfort in the knowledge that part of you is going
with your child.
The foundation you have provided over the past 18 years will
accompany your child across the miles and throughout the years.
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